My mother is always reading a new book, or two or three. She calls me from Ohio to tell me about the next book she’s sending me, books that compliment and sometimes contradict one another. As I photographed each book my has given me over the years, I asked her to tell me why she wanted me to have them. These books, along with her voice, act as clues to a time and place, positioning each of us within our respective generations. She and I have navigated the strange shifting of roles that comes with age: from child and parent, to friends, to child parenting her mother. Like many, she uses books to cope, to expand, to challenge herself, and to heal. Her books given to me mark major moments in her process and shifts in her feelings toward life’s immense and infinite changes. I have examined these books from my mother, both as physical and emotional objects. Through them I’ve grown to know her better and reconcile the contrasting parts of her that do not, at first glance, seem to fit.
Below is a selection of images from a series of thirteen works.
Our Bodies, Ourselves 1996, 2009
TEXT: Everybody is responsible for their own sexuality, and knowledge is power. I was first introduced to this book early in the feminist revolution. I was drawn to feminism after growing up in a paternalistic family and society. Like, I was told I couldn’t fly jets because women’s reflexes are slower than men’s. This book was part of the revolution. I wanted my daughters to know their bodies and not believe that social and cultural misinformation.
The Women’s Room 2001, 2009
TEXT: It was accessible and really put feminism in a real social context. I love this book. You know, the women’s room is also a place in Islamic traditions where a woman was sent to be isolated. So much of my early philosophical forays made me feel like, whoa, this country is bad. But a study of other cultures shows it could be worse. We weren’t binding women’s feet but we were binding women’s souls.
The Feminine Mystique 2001, 2009
TEXT: I remember that it was a very good book and it was a wardrobe basic, but nothing specific sticks with me. After a while, you know, a lot of the theories ran together until I got to GynEcology, which kind of annoyed me and I probably stopped reading feminist theory after that for a while.
A Self-Portrait in Letters 2004, 2009
TEXT: I don’t know what to say about this. A lot of stuff came from Judy Chicago’s project, The Dinner Party, and Anne Sexton was part of it. Although I never got to see The Dinner Party, you know, I have that book of it and I think I even have pages marked. I really loved that piece. I found the Sexton book for you at a yard sale; someone was selling someone else’s entire feminist library.
Gyn/Ecology 2004, 2009
TEXT: By then I was in a feminist reading and writing group in Hartford. That GynEcology was a pain in the ass to read. She’s one of the extremist feminists. Then we started reading poetry, too. It was my first book club. I took it through the University of Hartford. At the time, I had Cameron, and you were on the way, so I had a lot of distractions.
He’s Just Not That Into You 2006, 2009
TEXT: I’m sorry I gave you this book. But it was just about protecting you and giving you the tools to protect yourself. You can’t protect yourself from everything, that’s for sure.
Necessary Losses 2008, 2009
TEXT: I like that book. It’s about putting life in perspective and about how from the time you’re born you’re losing connection, and the book can help you get connection back. You have to go through certain losses. You have to be separate from your mother. We are all alone. I thought a lot of people should read it to put their lives in perspective.
The Seven Principales For Making Marriage Work 2009, 2009
TEXT: Well, I haven’t actually finished the book but I have read it and practiced basic kindness and consciousness and mindfulness. You know, it’s almost like the golden rule. And I gave it to you because I want you to have healthy relationships, to choose a partner who you know how to communicate your feelings with, and to know what it takes to keep connected. It’s another recipe for me trying to figure out what happened in my marriage and how to fix this one or better the next one.
Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man 2009, 2009
TEXT: This is pop culture’s attempt to facilitate relationships. I’m in the middle of a relationship disaster; it’s been devastating. Because of the crisis in my marriage, my friend is always telling me that we need to manipulate relationships and she suggested this book, which uses pop culture to reach people. I’ve read much, much more serious self-help books. Men want to feel like they are men, and to a lot of men, that means protecting and providing. That’s something he says in this book.
